Thats what we call life.

Yeah. had been working for a month and half. I had learnt so many things. a good and bad too. today in the office we got some a tension mode where everyone was so silence. Its fortunate for me since I dont have much work. Both my boss and senior engineer were gone to meeting. so there were only a few peoples in the office. 3 seniors and 4 new ones.

everything were okay at first until we were preparing for tender document where one of my office mate had made some mistake. I guess its not a big deal, but one of the senior was so freaking out. she screamed to us( juniors) like we never done anything at the office. seriously, its not a big deal but I dont know why she became that mad.

I am the very new one there, so its only me to face her. since I dont want the situation become worse, so I hold myself from talking back to her just like I always do. yeah, silent is the best solution. I let her anger out. yeah, I felt like crying to be shouted for a mistake that I dont even do. feels so stupid. and I am still okay with her. i dont want, because of that things we may have a problems later I hold what I feel inside. I have to work there for 2 years atleast. so I have to cope with everyone habits and personality. I am trying to be profesional as much as I can.

enough with that.

because of that matter, 3 office-mate have expressed their dissatisfaction towards this one senior. all of them said a same things. its all about how this senior cant even tolerate with others. even the seniors cant even into her.shes not a boss, but why we have to obey everything she told us. i felt so offended when she said, its not that hard to design a structure. the building already done, so the engineer just have to design based on that. she was talking about that with me, she just dont understand why we, engineer need 2-3 month just to complete both infra and structure design. now I know why architect and engineer cant have a conversation about works, its all contra. seriously.

luckily she was gone to meeting this evening. all 4 new workers (including me) expressed our dissatisfaction. well, when younger generations talk, its full with cursing. especially 3 of them are men and I am the only girl there. for sure I acted like innocent. just listened to them and laugh. so hypocrite right. LOL I was not act like I usually do. So not me!

well, its only a month and half we already got this kind of problem. I dont know how would it be for the next 3 4 months. hope everything will go well.

 ( ofc, my office isnt this big and grand.lol)

wish me luck, people!

mengular.

Tadi pagi, Han dan aku pergi JPS dekat Nusajaya. Journey yang mengambil masa 20minit tu lagi lama dari meeting yang kitorang attend tu. meeting tak sampai 10minit. huh. pegi 9 lebih, pukul 10 lebih dah setel. dah keluar dari bangunan tempat meeting tu pun. di sebabkan both of us ni the very fresh civil engineer, kitorang pun berpakat nak mengular. lepak kat cafe, pung pang pung pang... mengumpat 16 bakul. peh, heaven gila. mengular punya lama. yang kalw aku buat satu design kat esteem dah siap satu floor. haha. memang lama gila lepak tengok orang-orang yang kerja kat situ yang mengular jugak la kerjanya.

tapi at least segala beban dalam kepala otak aku ni dah lepas la semua. memang terasa gila macam ada satu batu yang terangkat dari kepala aku. lega sangat. terus hilang rasa stress, boring nak kerja. kira balik office pukul 3 petang tadi, aku dah fresh lah. yelah, selama ni pendam je apa aku rasa. 2 bulan kowt, pendam. so tadi, Han kata cakap je. so, jadi la sesi luahan hati. aku tak risaw sangat since dia lelaki. so, kebarangkalian nak menyampai tu kurang. lagipun kitorang mengumpat orang yang sama. jangan tak tahu, orang lelaki punya level mengumpat lagi hebat.haha.

then, kitorang gerak pegi McD. makan McD dengan orang hensem woi. haha. aku admit dia handsome ni. haha. pung pang pung pang, mengumpat sesi kedua. tapi ni banyak lebih pasal kitorang la. family, sekolah. camtu la. banyak gila aku cakap. dah lama tak cakap banyak wei sejak sejak keja ni. asyik stress je. muka pun ketat. haish. satu tak banyak cakap memang sebab aku stress banyak benda tak tahu. sebab kedua pulak, gila apa baru sebulan keja nak banyak cakap kan. slow slow lah. nak mix around kena la tengok juga range orang camne kan. takkan nak main hentam je. since range kali ni educated and agak berusia, so lain la cara nak approach. kat office tu yang muda cuma 4 orang. aku , Han, Zam ngan Iz. boleh la lawak lawak moden ni. aku tak buat lawak pun. just tumpang gelak.

ok. sekarang ni aku tak tahu camne nak endingkan entry ni. macam diary je. haha. a few things that I do today---hah, camtu lah konon-kononnya kalaw dalam diary. so, kalw habes camni je, oklah kan? kalau tak ok pun. do I care? haha

picture is the best to describe thing!

i guess nothing should say or write here.

just let the picture talk.lol

the process in between to have my name there already passed. no need to tell lah kan. and of course to LeBai to give me a support. she knew what happened on that day. HAX

FRENEMY IS THE BEST!




and I know my English is messy

kesimpulan

... tengah meredah jam yang macam haram on the way balek keja tadi, boleh lah kiranya aku simpulkan sesuatu yang selalu berlegar-legar(ceh) dalam kepala otak aku selama ni

"kenapa lah semua lelaki chinese semuanya hensem-hensem. lenchai-lenchai je"

apa yang aku boleh pikir tadi siang,

" sebab mestilah aku tengok yang hensem dan lenchai-lenchai je. apa jadahnya aku nak usha yang tak hensem kan. sama lah theory ni boleh jugak guna kat malay. lagi-lagi bila kat jam. keindahan ciptaan Allah tu kita kena hargai. hahaha"

ok. entry takde motif.

lagi satu,

kenapa kalw chinese couple berpayung-payung tak nampak annoying and nampak sweet je? kalw malay punya couple, rasa nak hempuk je.

kenapa eh?

maruah

--kadang-kadang aku rasa malu jadi sebahagian kaum perempuan, just because some people dont put their dignity higher than they should be. Well, kau dah tahu lelaki tu dah ada dua orang anak, but kau tetap membiang. whats that for. dah la peluk-peluk openly. looks like sengaja nak bagi orang nampak. WTH. bencinya. sebab tak boleh cakap straight to her face, thats why I write here. pray hard so I am not gonna be like that later in my life. seriously--

Karenah.

Phew. dah masuk 5 hari aku keja kat ECharis tu. tolak sabtu ahad, tolak lagi rabu lepas, aku dah separuh mati akibat keracunan makanan. tak seronok langsung ulang alik pegi toilet 3 minit sekali. muntah segala gala yang aku makan. peh, sakit betul sampai memang membuta satu hari aku mc tu. for now, semua under control. belum tension tahap migrain lagi lah. in the future pun camtu jugak. mintak mintak, Allah terangkan hati aku supaya senang nak terima tunjuk ajar senior.kekeke.

habes dah tentang kerja aku.

kerja belum men'tension'kan aku, tapi masalah lain pulak.

kadang-kadang bila tengok keadaan sekeliling kita, aku jadi takut dengan masa depan. takut nak kahwen sebab berlambak-lambak kat paper ada husband jual wife dia. ada suami before kawen, hamboi bukan main romantik. bila dah kawen kaki pukul pulak. haish. takutkan? keadaan persekitaran ni memainkan peranan yang penting betul lebih-lebih lagi bila nak buat keputusan. tapi kadang-kadang bila terlalu banyak berfikir, semua pun tak boleh. semua pun tak kena pada pandangan kita. bagi jodoh ni, aku cuma berharap bakal suami aku tu seorang yang beriman, mampu membimbing aku dan anak-anak kami kejalan Islam dan lurus. rajin berkerja dan TIDAK panas baran. dalam erti kata lain, penyabar.

habis soal jodoh. soal lain pulak, aku tengok orang bila dah tua makin banyak karenahnya. semua tak kena. kalw boleh apa kehendak mesti di tunaikan dalam waktu terdekat. tak boleh tangguh-tangguh. ni dari apa yang terdapat kat sekitar aku lah. tu okay lagi lah, boleh di layankan lagi. tapi bila part melaga-lagakan anak sendiri tu memang tak boleh blah. kenapa lah, ada mak yang sanggup membuatkan anak-anak dia sendiri saling salah faham. bermasam muka. keadaan jadi lebih buruk lagi bila anak-anak tak balik jenguk dia. mengungkit pulak. ada juga mak yang sanggup menyumpah anak cucu dengan benda-benda yang tak elok. melaknat anak sendiri agar di timpa musibah. just sebab tak mampu nak tunaikan permintaan dia, mungkin ujian Allah ke atas anak-anaknya. tapi kenapa lah, sebagai seorang ibu boleh bersifat macam tu. kesian kat anak-anak dan cucu-cucu dia.

ada pulak, makcik yang baru je kematian suami. masa suami meninggal, pehhh dia punya shahdu sampai peluk kubur suami tak nak balik. tapi tak sampai 2 tahun, dah kawin lain. yelah, jodoh tu Allah yang tentukan. kalw cara elok takpe jugak. ni kena tangkap basah. dengan suami jiran sebelah pulak tu. masa nak kawen tu macam ribut. yelah, anak-anak dia sure lah tak sanggup tapi masa tu bukan main riak lagi cakap bukan susahkan anak-anak pun. masa mula-mula kawen, semua pun manis. belikan tu, belikan ni. masuk bulan kelima...dah pindah balik rumah anak-anak. lebih membengangkan bawak pulak suami tu kat rumah anak-anak. anak-anak pun jaga hati. taknak kecikkan hati mak, padahal dalam hati masing-masing nangis. sedih. mak yang buat hal. anak-anak yang jadik mangsa hinaan orang kampung.

bila aku tengok benda-benda ni jadi kat sekeliling aku, aku doa banyak-banyak yang aku tak nak jadi macam tu. kalw di takdirkan aku sakit. biar lah kejap je. tak nak susahkan anak-anak. yelah, sebulan dua mungkin tahan lagi. tapi kalw dah bertahun-tahun, anak-anak pun jadi tak ikhlas. masa dia dah habes jaga aku pulak. biarlah dorang happy dengan keluarga masing-masing. biarlah aku jadi nenek, ibu, yang boleh bertolak ansur, boleh pikir rasional. nenek dan ibu yang menggembirakan semua keturunan aku. pehhh, tak boleh blah seyh. hahaha

peh, serious betul aku kali ni. macam tak sangka pulak aku dah masuk 24 tahun. rasa baru semalam aku enjoy kat sekolah. main-main kat U. jadi stalker sana sini. dah masuk zaman wanita dah. tapi bila nak mature aku pun tak tahu. hihihi.

dah lah, nak tengok tv. pastu tido la apa lagi. Highway Pasir Gudang jam woih pagi pagi. kena bangun awal. hope kedai makan kat Johor Jaya masak sedap-sedap hari esok dan seterusnya.hihi. chow~

woohoo....!!!

first day wasnt that bad. everything went well. my co-workers are so friendly. its the matter how you cope with them. just make yourself comfortable, then everything will be okay. or might be, it just because i am not getting my specific project to be handled. too many things to learn.

for now I have to learn and catch up as fast as possible since one of my office-mate will resign on 13 January. So, i have to take over all her works and continue. it gonna be a difficult task i guess. :(

hopefully, my brain will not lembab sangat lah. autocad, esteem... pls be good to me :)

2012

yeah, I know this is kinda late and lame. but, still wanna wish to all of you;

happy new year.

lets pray harder so our wishes gonna come true! yeah. hopefully this 2012 make us much better than 2011. Ameen. wishh to meet all my dear friends especially Gegadis and Fighters 0105. lama tak jumpa, kalw jumpa ni mau gosip tak tido tido.

today is 1 January 2012. Homaigod! 2 January, and I am gonna start working. So damn nervous. how to cope and adapt with a new environment, new people and the most important my scope of works. where i have to give my 110% commitment since it is a REAL working life. not a task or assignment or group work. responsibilities are getting bigger and heavy. So,  have to prepare both mentally and physically.

well, lets see how my first day gonna be. hope its great! pray for me everyone!